A Childhood Peeking

a golden shovel inspired by Sufjan Stevens’ “Fourth of July”

by Benjamin Rigby

We stay late feeling forced to 

make 

up time lost in desires untamed as 

the 

shame of pride taken away spreads 

most 

across our bodies, small and delicate, made 

of 

marker stains, blue-red and scraped knees 

your 

other friends didn’t receive. Snapshots of this 

life 

fade into view when I hear mourning doves call 

while 

lawn clippings fly and hose water streams down my back. 

It 

pushes forward memories I only get secondhand; Who 

is 

That Boy in the lime-green cast? With crutches 

rife 

digging into his flanks as the other boys question him 

while 

they hang from monkey bars. Do the girls whispering near wonder how 

it 

feels? I wish that little boy was here still and stuck perfectly as he 

is, 

I want to explain how he already has what people want: 

light


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Idiopathic & Juvenile